yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
