Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
