Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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