grandma shit on top of the toilet
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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