Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Randomize
