Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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