so explain again why im purple
no
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
how does that bad decision feel?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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