It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize