And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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