we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
