I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
