SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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