you guys were way drunker than both of me
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
