I feel like I'm in dance class right now
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
