yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
