I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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