Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
