Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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