wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
