Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize