Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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