so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
