we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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