He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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