you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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