drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Randomize