We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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