Old men and throwing up are my life now.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
