I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i love accidental penises.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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