My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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