Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
