I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
