whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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