You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
