I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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