I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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