Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize