You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
