Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
