and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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