so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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