You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
