"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
