I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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