Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
