the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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