I'm sorry my penis didn't work
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
