listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
