i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
