Little spoons don't ask big questions
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
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